New horse, new teacher ...

... Mum had the first of her evening lessons today, with a change of horse and a change of teacher.  Today she rode on Narnia.  We did ask her if she disappeared into a wardrobe at any point in the lesson, but she didn't seem to think that was funny.  We did!  Her new teacher is quite strict, so she tells us, and shouts a lot, but this is a good thing apparently because it means that she focuses better on what she needs to do.

Narnia

She took some apples again for the horse, but she tells us that there is one left so we hope that we will be given it tomorrow.

Fried, Egg and Spoon xxx

You can tell it's a Bank Holiday Weekend when ...

... we have nothing much to say.  Except cabbids.  We got a new one today.  Yum.

Fried, Egg and Spoon xxx

You can tell it's a Bank Holiday Weekend when ...

... The Railway Children is on.  Again.  And I watch it.  Again.

A message from Egg

Just to let you know that I am no longer broody.

Egg x

Can chickens knit?

We are not really sure.  We think that there might be a bit of a problem with the needles and holding them and all.  Also, the wool looks rather like spaghetti and we might well end up eating the wool instead of knitting with it.

Mum thinks that she might give it a go.  She went to her friend's new wool shop today for a sneak preview - it opens officially tomorrow.  She bought some wool and she has been trying hard to follow a pattern this evening.  She has knitted about five rows so far.

Should you need any wool, or need some knitting advice, don't come to Mum.  Go to her friend instead:

http://www.thewoolgarden.co.uk/

Fried, Egg and Spoon xxx

What is poh cur?

We only ask because that is what Dad says he is playing tonight with 'the boys'.  We like to play too, but mainly with snails when we chase them round the garden.  But we get the impression that this is not the same as this 'poh cur'.  Also, we only play snail games with each other i.e. with girls.  Perhaps Dad could bring these 'boys' round and they could play snails with us and we could play 'poh cur' with them.

Mum tells us that to play 'poh cur' you need to be clever.

In that case we would be brilliant at it.

Fried, Egg and Spoon xxx

What qualifications do you need to get into the SAS?

I only ask because I think that Egg has been studying on the sly to do it.

Bearing in mind that she is currently broody (yes, still), we have been shutting off the nest box at night so that she can't make a bee-line for it as she usually does at regular intervals during the day.  We do this by putting a plastic lego box in the nest box, with the lid jammed up against the hole between the roosting bars and the nest box.  This has worked in the past ... until tonight.  On checking the state of play at bedtime, we found not only Egg, but also Fried in the nest box.  Egg was comfortably stationed IN the box that was used to block, while Fried was scooched down the side of it.  The lid had been pushed out the of the way ....

(If I was going along religious lines, then it would link in very nicely with the Easter story here, and the the account of the stone that had been rolled away, but I think that a more, non-religious explanation is more appropriate).

I can only conclude that Egg has been getting lessons from an organisation such as the SAS or similar.

We are going to have to come up with a more cunning plan tomorrow night ...

What a treat! Lunchtime Cinema!

Special treat by the OH today.

Rise of the Planet of the Apes.  Cute in places, scary in others, sad in some.  But a good watch, especially as a special treat!

Oh dear, Mum's hooked

There we were, one of us broody, one of us pretending to be a goose, and the other one sauntering round thinking that maybe an egg might be laid ... or not, and then Mum comes back and tells us that she has booked more lessons on that four legged thing that smells of poo (like us, but we only have the two legs, and you can't ride us).  Apparently she enjoyed her horse riding lessons so much that she has booked more.  Here she is at the end of her lesson (she's the one on the right).

As long as she doesn't start to tell us to gee up, we think we'll be OK.

Fried, Egg and Spoon xxx

Who would live in a place like this?

Well, the people who paid for it had a bit of an issue with it, but I wouldn't mind!  I wonder what Gaudi would have come up with if he had been commissioned to make a chicken house?!  (In case you are wondering, this is the atrium of the Casa Mila in Barcelona, an apartment block).

What qualifications do you need to be a midwife?

I only ask because it seems that Fried has also taken to being broody - along with Egg, who seems to be making a habit of it (three times in as many months).  Fried spent rather a lot of time with Egg in the nest box this morning and when I turfed them both out she decided to seek refuge in the ... dare I say it ... playhouse ... she climbed in through the window since I had been shutting the door most days since they had not previously been using it.  Am I pleased that she used it?  Yes.  Am I pleased that she used it because she might be broody?  No!

I was rather hoping to break Egg of her broodiness rather than get Fried to join in with her.

Anyway, I am not sure whether I now need to get qualified in midwifery, or whether I can work on breaking both of them over the next few days.

Spoon, take note.  If you start doing it too, I'll have to take on reinforcements i.e. your Dad.

I think Mum is blind

I am not a monkey.

I am a chicken.

Yes it is true that I did stand on the steps and then come down again.  I thought I might get some more worms.

However, I turned round again pretty quickly and went straight to bed.

I don't know why she makes such a fuss.

Spoon x

When is a chicken like a monkey?

When she is called Spoon.

She has just sorted herself out ready to go to bed, climbed up the steps to the Cube, looked up at the house, noticed that there was a light on in the lounge (i.e. someone is there) and promptly jumped off the steps, ran down the garden and is now making a noise like a goose (but acting like a monkey) outside the kitchen window.

I am not sure whether to ignore her and let her work it out for herself (more noise and not going to bed for another 15 minutes) or to go outside with some worms and persuade her back to bed (can then shut the run door and she won't make any more noise until about 0545 tomorrow morning).

Worms it is.  Signing off for now to do bedtime duty.

Donuts. Is there anything they can't do? A frightening new response.

Donuts. Is there anything they can't do? A response.

They can't lay eggs.

Fried, Egg and Spoon xxx

Donuts. Is there anything they can't do?

Krispy Kremes.

Mmmmm.

Nuff said.

Why do they call it tennis elbow?

When Dad hasn't even been playing tennis?  Apparently, the human vet said that he is suffering from this affliction.  He is not allowed to put it under strain; we hope that this does not stop him from using his arm to throw worms out to us in the morning.

We found a cartoon about it.  We think the bird looks a little bit like a chicken (well more of a duck really) but it is supposed to be a seagull.  Perhaps it is related to all of the seagulls that wake Mum and Dad up at 0300 hrs.  The other thing is apparently a lugworm.

Get better soon, Dad!

Fried, Egg and Spoon xxx

Who is the best chef?

Now of course, the answer should be Dad.  But there are two others that are close contenders and are quite good on TV.  The first makes really good food and Mum and Dad like using his recipe books a lot.  The second has a really good TV series (with rather a lot of rude words in) and likes saying 'it's raw' a lot.

So, let's put them out there and see what you think ...

Jamie 

or

Gordon?

We like both of them, but as we say, Dad is the best (except when he cooks monkfish).

Fried, Egg and Spoon xxx

How many muscles do humans have?

We don't know.  But Mum tells us that she has discovered some new ones after her second riding lesson today ....

She has now mastered the rising trot and was able to get off Prima without using the block.  She says that it wasn't very graceful, but then we have never known her to be particularly graceful anyway, so that's no different to normal.

Fried, Egg and Spoon xxx

How many eggs do chickens lay in a day?

Well, according to the books, one.  They need 25 hours (or so) to get through their system and therefore they cannot lay more than one egg a day.  Fried would disagree.  In the space of one hour she laid two eggs (one normal and one softie).  Therefore the books must be wrong and it must be possible for chickens to have them 'backed up' as it were and ping them out one after another.  We think that it might be her entering 'old age'; knowing that she is supposed to lay eggs but not really sure when is the right time or how many to lay.  Poor Fried!

Going up in the world

No, we haven't taken flight ... not yet!  Apparently Mum has been cleaning in the kitchen today and she has told us that we now have our own cupboard in the kitchen.  This contains our special bowls, our handy mash container (as opposed to the big one in the shed), our catfood (Mondays and Fridays) and our mealworm treats.  Soon, we will take over the whole kitchen, like we have in the garden ...

Fried, Egg and Spoon xxx

Power Tool

Dad said that he would like us to post a picture of said power tool on the blog please.  He is very pleased with it.

We don't like it quite so much because it destroys our snacks.  

Fried, Egg and Spoon xxx

What is it with men and power tools?

Or more particularly, Dad.  He has just bought a new brush cutter.  He has just spent the morning with it, togged up in motorbike gloves (he didn't have any heavy duty gardening ones) and some ski goggles (he didn't have any safety ones).  And we now find that there are no plants at the back by the garage AT ALL. They are ALL GONE.  It would appear that said piece of kit clears plants back so well that there is almost no evidence that they were there in the first place.  It is a little bit frustrating.  We liked those plants to root about in.  But on the positive side, Dad had a great time with his new toy.

Fried, Egg and Spoon xxx

Can chickens drive cars?

We weren't given the chance to find out ... Mum and Dad went off to a driving experience today and left us behind!  Dad was the one doing the driving; we think that Mum read a book while he was doing it.  The pictures are of Dad and we are very proud of him.  We are sure that we would have driven these cars really well, and we have chosen the one that we think matches us best (with a little explanation of course ...).

Ferrari 360

Fried 

This would be my car because it starts with the same letter as my name and most people think of this kind of car first as the one that they want to drive i.e. it is Number One; like me.

Aston Martin V8 Vantage

Spoon

This would be my car because it is exactly the same colour as me and it is very sleek like me.

Lamborghini Gallardo

Egg

This would be my car because it is certainly the cutest, especially in yellow.  And I am the cutest chicken.

Porsche 996 GT3

Baked RIP

This would have been my car if I was still around because it is the meatiest one and it is the same colour as I was.  

My Favourite Places 6

Fallingwater, Pennsylvania

A creation by Frank Lloyd Wright in the 1930s.  It's built over a waterfall so when you are in the lounge you can hear it below you.  And there is a hatch arrangement so that you can walk down some steps to be really close to it.  Totally awesome.

Real Housewives

I have become somewhat addicted to the series 'The Real Housewives of Orange County'.  It is currently running Season 6 on ITV2.  It's incredible.  The outfits they wear, and some of the things that they say and do.

These are the kind of clothes that they wear when they are going shopping.  Last episode, one of them had a beauty party and had arranged for them all to have botox as a special treat.

I haven't dared let the chickens see an episode.  I think that they would start getting ideas if I did.  They would probably insist on having a spa in the garden, and champagne on tap.

Mind you, I wouldn't mind having that lifestyle; just for a day ..

Getting parred by your Mum ... and your Dad

There I was, sharing the exploits of my first horse-riding lesson with my parents, explaining that I might possibly have had to use a block to get on the horse (it being quite big and all) and my Mum turns round and tells me that 'it really isn't that difficult'.  She then goes on to tell me that she had ridden horses in Cuba (or it might have been Mexico) in her youth.  Not content with that, my Dad then regaled me with tales of how he had fallen off a polo pony in India.  And there I was thinking that achieving a rising trot on my first lesson was quite good.  That'll learn me ...

Where has the lilac gone?

When we woke up this morning it was there.  By lunchtime it had gone; well at least shrunk to half its previous size.  We understand that Granny and Grandpa took it home with them when they left.  We don't know why they did that; they already have lots of plants in their garden (which we would love to go and eat if we were allowed to).  However, it is fair to say that it does look a bit tidier now.

Fried, Egg and Spoon xxx

Granny and Grandpa

We have had a very enjoyable day today with Granny and Grandpa.  They brought us leaves from their sprout plants which we have nibbled on, along with some chickweed which we are not so sure about at the moment ... even though we are often called chickweeds by Dad.  They have also fed us other treats such as Marks and Spencer biscuits and cheesy nibbles.  Yes, we know they are not supposed to do that, but we did like them lots ... :)

Fried, Egg and Spoon xxx

Can Mum ride horses?

It would seem that she can.  She might have difficulty getting on and off them (she tells us that they are 'quite big') but she has achieved walking, turning and trotting in her first lesson - including a rising trot without holding onto the saddle for dear life.  Of course to us chickens, this means very little but we are sure that it will mean something to those who follow this blog who know something about horses.  She is very much looking forward to her next lesson on Prima who is a very nice horse.  We did want to put a picture of the horse here but could not copy it from the website so you will have to look for yourself:

http://www.summerhouseec.co.uk/horses.asp

We hope that she doesn't suddenly want a horse instead of chickens.  We don't think that the garden would really be big enough, so we are safe for now ...

Fried, Egg and Spoon xxx

And finally ...

... there are no more nice men in the house (apart from Dad of course) and they are not coming back ... this must mean that finally the water/boiler/heating is sorted.  Dad is doing some exercise and Mum has just come back from her first horse riding lesson (more about that in another post) and now they can have as many hot showers as they want without worrying!

Fried, Egg and Spoon xxx

Who needs hot water anyway?

Sorry about the lack of posts over the weekend.  We have been trying to get into the house to use the computer, but Mum and Dad shut the door when they came into the garden to cut down the brambles growing at the back of the garden and we haven't figured out how to push the window open enough for us to get in.

Mum and Dad are waiting for the nice men to come back round again to sort out the boiler/cylinder/hot water.  The cylinder is working and producing hot water; the nice men say that now they think it is the boiler that is the problem.  It's never ending.  As far as we are concerned, you don't need hot water to keep clean anyway, a nice dust bath will do the job just fine.

Fried, Egg and Spoon xxx

Now then ...

... still not there!  However, we have something rigged up to the immersion that means that we have hot water temporarily until Monday when the nice man is coming back ... again ... and I have had my first hot shower at home in a month.  It was the most amazing thing ever ...

Nearly there ...

... but not as close as yesterday unfortunately.  Apparently some of the pipes aren't quite right so there is another bit to be added and some more pipes to be run through to the front of the house so I'm not sure where we are!  The chickens have offered to help but they are struggling with holding the spanner.  And I think they might end up pecking at the pipework ...

Nearly there ...

... but not quite.  The cylinder is in, the pipes are in, the wires are in ... yet it still is not quite working and the nice man needs to come round tomorrow to finish it all off.  Poor chap, we scared him today (it was a different one to yesterday) because he doesn't like birds.  He did take a bit of a step back when Mum asked us to come into the kitchen to say hello.  We weren't going to peck him or anything ...

Fried, Egg and Spoon xxx

There is no longer anything big in the hall ...

... except Mum's backside ... only joking, Mum :)

The water cylinder is now in the cupboard under the stairs and is being fitted by an engineer as we write.  He did come and say hello to us, but I don't think he really understands chickens.  He seemed to think that we were something to eat and mentioned roast potatoes.  Surely people only eat those oval things that come out of our bottoms; they don't actually eat chickens ... do they?

Anyway, he is working on the water pipes and there is an electrician coming tomorrow to do the rest.  There will be hot water tomorrow evening.  No more smelly Mum!

Apparently the old cylinder (which is outside the front door in pieces) had been leaking for a while.  A while being a year or so ... crikey!

Fried, Egg and Spoon xxx

There is something big in the hall ...

... we have been trying to get past it to get upstairs to watch television but we can't seem to squeeze past.  It's most annoying.  Mum, however, is doing a little dance in the kitchen.  On closer inspection, we realise that the thing in the hall is a new water cylinder.  Mum tells us that the nice man is going to come to fit it tomorrow.  Now we realise the significance of the dance; it's one of those celebration things that humans do when they are happy.

Fried, Egg and Spoon xxx

Can chickens ride horses?

We are not sure; we think that perhaps our legs might not reach far enough to put our feet in the stirrups.

However, Mum is going for lessons next week to see if she can.  Dad is going to watch and laugh (but he has said that he will wait to do this until the second lesson, just to be fair).

We are looking forward to hearing her horsey tales (or should that be tails?!)

Fried, Egg and Spoon xxx